Oral sex as fantastic foreplay, is one of my favorite things to receive and have the pleasure of giving! But I have a very selfish best girlfriend, who just loves having her private parts licked and sucked… but she can absolutely not imaging going down on her boyfriend, to return his intimate and loving gift! Pretty damn self absorbed and selfish I would say!!! She made up in her mind years ago that his penis stinks… not to mention the fact, that pee comes out of it! I tell her she’s gotta get over it, and start thinking about how much he would enjoy it… especially when she knows, how much she likes it! I know he loves her dearly, but after 6 years of dating he hasn’t popped the question yet! So this is one thing I keep on bugging her about! Maybe he won’t ask you to marry him, cause you’re not willing to sexually give all of you to him!

The vibrating tongue ring made all the difference to her!

Since me and my husband loves to indulge in oral sex, we like to experiment with different kinds of sex toys too… especially the kind that can enhance the sensation, and wonderful gratification of oral sex play! We especially like our new “Shots Vibrating Tongue Ring“, which provides strong vibrations and maximum stimulation! We take turns wearing it, and it feels so fantastic when having that vibrating tongue vibe tickle and stimulate your private parts! Actually, sometimes we use it on the fingers too, just to relax aching shoulders and stiff joints! And it’s really easy to use as well! All you do is fit the ring below, at the base of the tongue or like I mentioned before… slide it over any of your fingers! If you like, you can use the vibrating bullet all by itself too, which I sometimes do when engaging in solo play!

So one day, I’d forgotten to put my tongue vibe back in the bedroom stand drawer, and my girlfriend curiously asked me, what that thing was! Quickly I grabbed the opportunity to explain in detail what it was, and what it is used for! First she showed little interest, since it had to with oral sex fun, but soon I could literally see her brain wrestling with the thought about how this little fun sex toy devise, could fit into her love life! Finally she blurted out, that she could actually imagine herself wearing a tongue ring vibrator, cause it would kind of cover up a bit of it… and maybe now, oral sex wouldn’t be so yucky to perform after all! I can’t wait to hear how this turns out, and if she goes trough with it… I know her boyfriend will be the happiest dude on earth! Mine for sure is!!!

All little girls dream about marrying a handsome prince and become a beautiful princess, but unfortunately that dream doesn’t come true for most of us! Don’t give up on your royal sex fantasies so fast though… cause the sex toys industry, always comes up with that special toy you need to role play with! Check out the “Prince Willy Yum Dong“, straight from the “Fuckingham Palace”, which appropriately comes with a royal crown in the shape of a cockring!

Turn your lover into the prince you always dreamed of, by having him wear the royal cockring… giving you that long-lasting, love making session all lovely princesses deserve! Use your 6 inch long, 1.75 inch diameter “Prince Willy Yum Dong” made from PVC skin like material when he’s not around, for a royally pleasing masturbation session! Or indulge in fantastic foreplay together with your lover, using your private prince dong in which ever sex pleasing way you like!

Make your next romantic encounter a royal sex feast!

One thing I know for sure is that when the royal wedding is aired on TV, my hubby will do most anything not to watch it together with me! So I thought that if I gave him a royal bribe to do so, I might convince him to stick around! I’m not ashamed at all… yes, I do use sex against my better half when I want to get my way, but don’t we all at one time or another!!! So the night before the wedding, I’m going to present him with the crown cockring together with his favorite meal… and give promises of fantastic sex whenever he so pleases, throughout that whole wedding day! Now that’s an offer I definitely know he can’t refuse!

Finding new and exciting sex toys to liven up all the sex fun between two lovers, is always a must in my book! But lots of times the partners involved, are using their favorite sex toys all by themselves, to get in the mood for romance! Like for example… one is getting turned on by a rabbit vibrator and the other is enjoying a butt plug and so on… but you’re doing it separately, if you get my drift! And I have to admit, that sometimes when me and my lover does that, I end up having an orgasm before the love making even started! And once I reached my climax, I’m not so into having intercourse anymore! Actually, he would get rather pissed off at me, when that happened which I totally can understand. So I thought to myself… I should get a sex toy we could use and get turned on with together! And that’s exactly what I found in the “Wonderful Wonderful Wabbit” vibrator!

It teases my clit and pulsates against his balls!

This fantastic sex toy is called the “Wonderful Wonderful Wabbit” and when they say wonderful, they really mean it! Just check out all it does!!! First it’s a cockring that gives a snug squeeze from the stretchy material which as you know, ensures a long lasting erection, meaning more long lasting sex fun for the two of you! Then one of the bullets will provide thrilling, tickling clitoral stimulation from a pair of fluttering “wabbit” ears… and from the other bullet, some strong pulsating vibes against his balls, bringing on an exciting, arousing buzz!

Each bullet comes with multi-speed adjustable  remote controls, so you can make the vibrations stronger for him and less strong for her or visa verse! You can also remove the bullets and create your own sex fun, without the vibrating sensation, which we found to be really exciting as well! So now, instead of using our favorite sex toys by our selves to get in the mood for romance, we can use this one together and reach the same results… all while having intercourse, exactly the way my lover wants our love making sessions to go down! Check it out, you’ll absolutely love it guaranteed!

The world of unusual vibrators are forever evolving, making the use of vibrators more and more interesting and sexually challenging each and every day! One particular new way of reaching stronger, longer and more intensely gratifying orgasms, is through the revolutionary stimulation system called the “Nexus iStim”! And if you have absolutely no idea what I’m talking about… I think what I’m about to say, is truly going to peek your interest right away!

This system was created to stimulate your sensitive, erogenous nerve zones through small jolts of electricity, by placing electrode pads on your skin… like inside your thighs, on your breasts or around your vaginal area and so on! Or through sex devises like Nexus cock rings and sexually inviting dildos, which comes in all kinds of shapes and forms! And if you’re already a true lover of this new and exciting, erotically enticing system, or is interested in becoming one… the Nexus iSTIM line has improved upon their unique and very creative products… to bring on new dimensions of electrifying sensations, by adding the “Istimatt Conductive Attachments“! And after trying this exciting way of reaching fully gratifying, sexual satisfaction through electro stimulation, together with the new attachments… I’m truly a fan all the way!!!

The new and exclusive “Istimatt Conductive Attachments”!

This new and exclusive “Istimatt Conductive Attachments” are created and designed to connect your Nexus sex toys with the Nexus iSTIM! And they couldn’t have made it easier too plug into either. Just remove the silver roller ball from any of your Nexus sex gadget and clip the relevant Istimatt conductive attachment into place, to secure each pack, containing three different sized attachments! And you can attach them to any of your Nexus toys, like the fantastic Nexus glide, Excel, Titus, Neo and VibroMade! So, if you’re either a connoisseur of the Nexus iSTIM or a novice to the new, extremely exciting world of electro stimulation… you’re definitely in for some amazingly awesome ways of reaching the most erotically satisfying, of electro induced orgasmic pleasures ever!!!

Now to the most amazing part of all… at least for me!

I’ve always felt somewhat sexually incomplete, well almost handicapped for the reason that I’ve never been able to enjoy an orgasm without clitoral stimulation!  I know that I’m certainly not alone, when it comes to this problem! And when my girlfriends told me, they could easily have climaxes just through vaginal stimulation, I felt they where almost bragging a bit to me! So, when I found about this new stimulation system through electrode pads, I was eager to find out if it could help me! And to my amazement it did! For the first time in my life I could have a vaginal orgasm, without any clitoral stimulation what so ever! I can’t guarantee the same results for anyone else, but I’m so glad I checked out this Nexus iSTIM system, because it’s a whole different sensation all together, of being able to reach a vaginal orgasm all by itself! Plus it made me feel totally, sexually complete as a women!!!

When I first met my boyfriend, I didn’t dare to tell him about my little secret which is, I guess, a kind of strange bondage fetish of mine! I don’t quite know when and how it first started, but I remember as a little girl… I absolutely adored dogs and often wished that I would turn into one! Especially when my parents would pay much more attention to the family dog, who seemed to get in much less trouble than I would, on a daily basis!

Anyway, in my strange warped mind, I thought that if I behaved more like a cute dog, people would like me more! It went as far as me not going to the bathroom, only for a short while though… and instead would carry my number “twos” on a stick and then flush it down the toilet! Ofcourse I soon realized, nobody thought that was anything close to cute!

It become a full blown fetish, when all grown up!

After turning around twenty-five years old and finding out about fetishes and bondage play, my unique fetish really become a full blown one! But I also have to say, that I was quite relived to see, that there’s tons more fetishes which are even stranger than mine! So, I would go on the adult internet and find all kinds of fun bondage collars! I think by now, I have over 20 different ones! I have my glamour diamond studded collar which is for more formal occasions and leather ones, in all kinds of colors. And ofcourse, they all come with matching leashes! I even have one that’s pretty kinky too! With the collar comes two nipple clamps, which I find extremely erotic to wear!

Okay, now you know all about my unusual fetish and how it all started! So let’s go to the part about my new boyfriend and letting him in on my secret! It took my easily about three month, to even bring it up! But I could tell, that he already knew I had something brewing inside of me, I couldn’t wait to talk about. So actually, he was the one who insisted, I’ll come out with it already! But instead of telling him, I decided to show him! That night I made him wait around for a bit, so I could get ready! I wanted to look my best, so together with my diamond studded collar and leash, I put on some really sexy, black lingerie, fixed my hair and the make-up was painted like a cute, little puppies face… all to look wonderfully, sexually challenging and inviting!

He absolutely fell in love with the whole fetish concept!

I wish I would have had a camera with me, cause boy, the look on his face was totally unforgettable! First I got a bit scared, and thought to myself… well he’s out the door, in the matter of seconds. But I couldn’t have been more wrong cause soon, to my udder relief,  his face lit up like a million candles! — I was the most adorable thing, he’d ever laid eyes on and he couldn’t wait for me to make the next move… meaning, how could he fully participate in my fetish! So I quickly told him… just treat me like your little puppy that you love to play with,  cuddle with and give tasty treats too! Cause trust me I said, I’ll be the cuddliest, most loyal and willing to please puppy, you’d ever had the pleasure of owning!

Boy this year went fast, but my favorite day is coming up, so I’m really glad it did! At Valentines day, I always try to do something extra special. And my man is expecting it, so the pressure is on, to create a memorable evening, that totally puts my last Valentines day to shame… even though last years, was pretty damn good! This year I have some extra money saved up, so I’m going or maybe I should say, putting out all the way! We went to visit some relatives of his in Germany, during the “October Beer Festival” and we had the greatest time ever. So that’s where I’m getting all my Valentines ideas from, to bring back some wonderful memories!

It’s my turn to be his German Beer Babe!

I have to admit that I thought most German beer ladies where fat and ugly, mainly because they always seem to portray them that way in the movies or what not! But boy, was I sadly misinformed, cause there was plenty of gorgeous looking beer babes, serving German beer allover the place! Well, there where some fat and ugly ones there too, but ofcourse those didn’t catch my mans eye. No, only the pretty and skinny ones did! I was a bit jealous in the beginning of our trip, but soon got kind of used to his wandering eyes. Because there where some very attractive beer boys, serving beer and bratwurst too! So believe me, I equally got my fill of both nice looking men and beer!

So, since he liked the German beer babes so much, why not become one myself! You know how the saying goes… If you can’t beat them, join them! But don’t bother to go to any costume shop, like I did! First they didn’t have anything close to what I was looking for and secondly, everything was really over prized. No, go directly to an online costume shop! I found the biggest selection I’d ever seen, in a sex toys shop! I mean, they had everything you could ever imagine. From all kinds of role playing outfits to tons of traditional sexy outfits, from most every country around the world! And they where all really, really cute and sexy… just the way I wanted it!

I made a complete transformation!

The one I got came with a cropped top and a velvet corset with a zipper back plus a skirt and choker… really, really sexy and cute I might add! But I didn’t stop there, cause I wanted to make a complete transformation, where he almost wouldn’t recognize me at all! So together with the German beer outfit, I got one of those black, long haired wigs… (he likes long hair) and then some really sexy, black stripper shoes! Wow, when I got dressed up in the whole new outfit, I couldn’t hardly recognize myself! So, this is how my Valentines day is going down! For dinner I’ll be serving bratwurst and sour grout with mashed potatoes and for dessert, I’ll have Black Forest German chocolate cake. Together with tons of German beer ofcourse, served in the beer mugs we bought over there! And you guess right! It will all be served by me… the sexy, cute looking German beer babe, he had all eyes for!!!

If you’ve been thinking about getting a subscription from your doctor for Viagra or other types of sexual male enhancing products… but is way to embarrassed to bring it up! Don’t you worry about it any longer, cause now, you can order from the privacy of your home… no embarrassing questions asked! And all the male enhancement stuff online, is just as fantastic… just without a prescription and a nosy doctor, asking stupid questions about your private sex life and so on!

Just check out the huge selection you can choose from!

You’ll be totally amazed, when you go to a sex toys store over the internet and see all the different male sexual enhancers they have to offer! And usually when you scroll down on the first enhancers page a bit, they have a long description, on the various products designed to enhance sex for males! From products which can be great for your stamina, stay erected longer and prolonging climaxes… to all types of creams and lotions that will make your penis larger and the orgasms more intense and longer too! !

And then ofcourse, its all kinds of different brands of pills to choose from! The most popular brand is “Phuck” which are made from totally natural ingredients, such as the highly treasured Peruvian root, called Maca plus other ancient blends of natural herbs! And they take affect really quickly too… only like in 30 minutes or so! Plus one pill lasts for up to 72 hours! But best of all, they come at a really low price… just under six bucks each! And when you see how great they work, you can invest in a whole bottle, containing 24 capsules for a low price of only $66.00! Oh, and they a perfectly safe to have a few mood setting, relaxing cocktails with too!

I can’t believe what’s going on in Washington these days! It seems like all the house and senate wants do, is blame President Obama for everything that’s going wrong… without as much, as lifting a finger to help him! I mean, you have to admit that the guy is giving it a hell of try, to be a great president and do the right thing… but which ever way he turns, he’s met by oppositions from both the people and the government!

And by escaping to India, North Korea and Asia after that disastrous mid-election on his latest outing, didn’t help much, cause it seems that these countries, aren’t to willing to work with him either! Can’t really blame them, with all the uncertainty and indecisiveness going on with the US right now!

I say, change strategy all together President Obama!

What I’m about to say now, is in all good fun… but I think all these politicians in Washington, need to relax a bit more… especially before voting, for an unpopular Obama bill! So here it goes! Remember John F Kennedy, and how he had lots of sex during his presidency! I can’t say that I approved of him having all that sex with other lovers, than his gorgeous first lady… but I don’t think any man could turn down Marilyn Monroe, when she put out!

And what about Bill Clinton and his little secret rendezvous in the oval office, with that intern Monica Lewinsky! Ofcourse it didn’t sit well with Hillary. But these little sex escapades, just seemed to make for a happier, more relaxed, less frustrated president at times! So here’s my point… satisfying, gratifying sex works! Just imagine, before either the house or the senate is about to vote, (it would obviously not be appropriate to hand out hookers or have their girlfriends show up)… but how about handing the gentlemen a handheld pocket pussy and for the ladies… a discreet finger vibrator!

Suddenly a whole lot of buzzing on Capitol Hill!

So sit back and relax, all you folks in Washington and take some time out for a nice handheld ride into orgasm country… I’ll guarantee you, it will take all that aggression, frustration and fighting out of em right away! And maybe after they’ve enjoyed a really great climax, they’ll all loose that willingness to disagree and for once, decide to work together instead! Remember how the saying goes… a satisfied customer, is a happy customer! So my little fantasy theory is Mr. Obama, everything will work in your favor due to the fact… that a satisfied representative, makes for a happy house!

Every time I go to a spa, to enjoy some well deserved pampering, I always end up spending much more than I really wanted to! It’s expensive enough just to get a massage a facial, and a manicure as it is. But those spa employees are so damn great at selling you extra stuff like different kinds of massage oils, relaxing fragrant candles and what not… you look like a freaken fully loaded, over packed donkey, going out the door! And like I said, that stuff doesn’t come cheap either.

I’m sure they buy it for next to nothing and then add like 500%! No, to hell with getting ripped off anymore!!! Actually after I’m done with all the pampering, I only feel great for a couple of minutes, cause it’s always one of those selling machines blocking the door on the way out!

Now check out this fantastic deal!

Look what I came across in one of those sex toys shops on the adult internet last week! It just happened by accident, cause usually when I go to a sex toys shop, I check out all kinds of different sex gadgets… right! Well, I guess I was a bit irritated after my last massage and all the extras they talked me into, before leaving. So when I noticed a sex candles category, I couldn’t wait to see what they had to offer!

And boy, was I surprised to see how many candle pages they had… not to mention the low, low prices! Just check this out!!! Everything they have at the spa, they also had at this internet sex toys store! Everything from those relaxing, soothing candles in most every fragrance you can imagine.. to those really in pheromones candles, everyone is talking about!

The massage candles contain natural ingredients too!

And I was totally delighted to see that all the massage candles contain natural ingredients as well! You know… like jojoba oil, avocado oil, sesame oil, grape seed oil, almond oil, palm oil… the list, just goes on and on! And all those different scents… some which are aphrodisiac, some therapeutic, some extra soothing and relaxing and so on! And not only does the packaging look great, the prices are really low too! After browsing through pages of hot body wax candles and all kinds of different sex candles, I found this “Massage Candle Trio” one!

It has all natural ingredients like soy-oil which burns longer and cleaner they say… and with 8 different kinds of natural ingredients such as hemp seed, vitamin E, jojoba, avocado and apricot oils. And you don’t just get one massage candle, you get three of them in the scents and flavors of Dreamsicle, Polynesia and Skinny Dip! Well, I’m not quite certain of what those scents and flavors smell and taste like, so I was eager to find out! Plus they are all 100% vegan and non-toxic too! But best of all, the price was only $14.85! Now, beat that, all you over priced spa’s out there!

Now if I can only get my husband to give me a massage…!

After I got them and lit the one called the Dreamsicle… that one smelled and tasted like a yummy, multi flavored citrus which I found to be very tantalizing and refreshing! The one called the Polynesia, reminded me of soothing vanilla and the one named Skinny Dip, brought back memorizes of fresh smelling ocean breezes! I really liked them all! And after taking a long bath, it felt just wonderful to massage the oils on my skin which left me feeling rejuvenated, silky smooth and fresh!

“Now, if I can only get my husband to give me a long lasting, relaxing massage… I never have to go back to one of those overpriced spas, ever again!”

I’ve been watching my 23 year old daughter and her multitude of friends, running around dozens of stores that offers Halloween outfits, for easily over a week now… and every time they come home, they are all empty handed and totally sad faced! As an over baring mother, my daughter always tells me to say out of her cool aid! But there are times, when I just have to over ride her wishes and get involved! And I think this is the perfect time to do so, cause I know she’ll be very thankful in the end!

She probably doesn’t know but I do surf the adult internet!

First I was a bit decisive about offering my help in this Halloween costume matter, since I had to tell her that the sexiest outfits around, can be found on the adult internet… in one of those sex toys shops! But I quickly gathered my strength up and eagerly waited for my daughter to arrive home from work! I carefully inquired about her Halloween shopping and how it was working out! Once again that sad face came upon her and she quite irritably informed me… “it’s going absolutely no where, for none of us”!

She stared me in the eye for a moment and then asked… why I had that look of a cat, who just swallowed the canary! I could feel all my strength running out of me right then and there, but when she yelled at me … “well”… I took a deep breath and told her! You know, how you and all your girlfriends have been running around, from store to store to find that perfect Halloween costume! I know “The” place to find, exactly what you’re looking for you!!! Her face lit up like a candle… oh please mommy, tell me where… I’m desperate!

Thank God it totally slipped her mind to ask anything!

I took her over to the kitchen computer and typed in my favorite sex toys shop and then clicked on the “Sexy Role Play Outfits” category! And immediately, tons of images of all kinds of sexy outfits popped up like magic! I mean, pages and pages of them, of every sexy out fit you could possibly imagine! From Snow White, to Harem girl… to Beer Babe and Asian Persuasion plus everything in between! I was so damn happy, my daughter didn’t inquire any further about me knowing about this place! I think it totally slipped her mind, cause immediately she scooted my out of the way, plopped her lovely behind down… and started to text all of her girlfriends about the fact that she’s found the “mother lode” of tons of Halloween costumes!

Actually after two hours, she was still in front of the computer, chatting on the cell, checking out different sexy Halloween outfits! It was just music to my ears, seeing and hearing my little girl so overjoyed, but it was already late so I retired into to my bedroom! I thought I’ll ask her in the morning instead, how everything went down! Unfortunately, I didn’t catch her the next morning… but she had left me a note on the kitchen counter stating… “Really dank mom, I didn’t know you where hip enough to check out the adult internet”! Thanks, I owe you one!!!